Rachel's Secret Read online

  “You’re perfect,” Cora said. “Just the way you are.”

  “I don’t feel like it.” I paused before I made my big announcement. The thing I’d been thinking about all night. “But I think I have a solution,” I told them.

  They both stared at me, waiting.

  I stared back. Then, slowly, I said, “I think I might want to become human. All the time.”

  Chapter Six

  Silence.

  Complete silence. That’s the response I got from my big announcement.

  “I’ve thought about it a lot,” I told them, slowly swimming toward the table. “It’s not an easy decision to make.”

  Shyanna and Cora both looked shell-shocked.

  “Why would you want to do that?” Cora asked quietly, frowning.

  “It just seems easier,” I said.

  I plopped down in a chair, and we all faced each other in a circle. “You know how mermaid magic works,” I said. “I would stay on land and not go near salt water for six months. After that, I would lose my tail. I could swim in the ocean, and it still wouldn’t come back. And after I lost my tail, I would slowly start to forget that I’d ever been a mermaid. I would have memories of my life, of course, but it would all be kind of hazy. I’d believe I had always been human. End of story.”

  “You’d be willing to do that for a boy?” Cora asked, shocked.

  “I wouldn’t do this for a boy,” I replied. “I would do this for me. I wouldn’t have to feel like a freak anymore. I would be free from all the lies. I would be a normal person.”

  Shyanna started to cry. “But you would lose your beautiful tail,” she said. “And what about all the wonderful parts of being a mermaid? What about exploring caves, looking for long-lost treasure? You’d never be able to talk to sea creatures again. And you would lose us.”

  “I would remember you,” I said. “Just not all of it. And you could visit me once you have your legs.”

  Cora was up again, swim-pacing back and forth. “You wouldn’t be able to race in the ocean. Or go to mermaid school or concerts. You wouldn’t remember the King and Queen. You wouldn’t remember the Melody Pageant. And what about your dad?”

  I nodded. “I’d have to convince him to come with me. I could never leave him behind. I think he would do it. My mom was human. We could be too.”

  “I think that’s about the saddest thing I’ve ever heard,” said Shyanna. “We would miss you.”

  “You haven’t even started school yet,” Cora said softly. “And I really wanted you to join us on the Spirit Squad,” she added. “But … it’s also not right for mermaids to be sad.”

  Shyanna lifted her head to stare at Cora. “What are you saying, Cora?”

  “I don’t want her to leave,” Cora said. Then she turned to me and asked, “But are you really that miserable and unhappy?”

  I bit my lip and twirled my hair around my finger. “I love being a mermaid. And Neptunia is so wonderful. I’d miss you two so much.” I paused, thinking how to say what I wanted to say. “It’s just that … sometimes I feel left out … and so different from everyone else. And I’d really like to tell Owen the truth. He’s always been honest with me, and he doesn’t understand why I can’t always be around. He was my first best friend.”

  “We’re your best friends too,” Shyanna said, her voice soft.

  “I know. But Owen and I have a history. Like you two do,” I explained.

  “Being different isn’t bad, you know,” Shyanna said. “Who wants to be exactly the same as everyone else?” She was blinking fast, and her eyes were shiny with tears.

  “Stay with us,” she begged. “You’d be so unhappy never being a mermaid again. We’ll come to shore with you as soon as we’re thirteen. We can meet Owen when we get our legs. All of us can be friends. You can have both worlds if you stay with us. If you become human, that will be your only world.”

  Cora jumped up again. “We could make sure no one makes fun of you,” she said.

  I smiled at both of them. “You know I love you girls. But you can’t always be around to protect me.”

  There was a noise from the front door. Dad swam inside. “Hey! Is there a party going on here without me?” He looked at Shyanna and Cora’s faces. “Did I interrupt something? This looks like a serious party.”

  I glanced at my friends and shook my head slightly, pretending to zip up my lips so they’d know not to say anything.

  “Not at all, Mr. Marlin!” Shyanna said. She tried to sound happy, but he frowned as if he suspected something was wrong.

  “Listen, girls,” he said. “The Queen wanted to let you know how thrilled she was with her concert — and you three, especially, for giving it such a good opening. She offered up her cook to make a special meal for us. Would you girls like to have dinner and then sleep over here with Rachel tomorrow night?”

  Shyanna swam close and wrapped her arms around me tightly, hugging me like she’d never let go.

  “We’d love to,” Cora said, but her smile didn’t last very long.

  Dad frowned. He knew something was up.

  Chapter Seven

  After dinner, Dad sat down with me while I was putting clam juice in my hair to make it shine. “You wanted the girls to sleep over, didn’t you?” he asked. “I thought it would be nice for you, but maybe I should have asked you first.”

  “Of course, Dad. It’ll be great!” I ran my fingers through my hair to spread the juice around more evenly. “You know how much I love those girls. And having the Queen’s cook make us dinner? Yummy!”

  “I have a surprise before the girls come over,” Dad said. “For the two of us. So don’t make any plans.”

  “Okay!” I wasn’t ready to have a serious talk about becoming human yet, so I told him I was tired from all the concert excitement and went to my bedroom early that night.

  I lay in my bed for a long time, staring up at my ceiling. The girls were seriously making me rethink my plan. I really did love being a mermaid. I loved the ocean and all the creatures, and I knew I’d miss everything I had to give up. Not only that, my dad would also have to give up the job he seemed to love so much.

  The thing was, I suspected Regina was going to try to cause a lot of trouble for me. And I remembered all too well how hard it was to be made fun of all the time, especially when merkids also made fun of my mom. I missed her all the time, and I didn’t care if she was part human or part penguin. I didn’t want to hear anyone talking badly about her.

  If only all the mermaids could accept me for who and what I was. I had Shyanna and Cora, but I’d always be the odd mermaid out. And what about Owen? I didn’t want to lose the first best friend I’d ever had.

  I finally fell asleep, these thoughts drifting through my mind.

  When I woke up in the morning, Dad was already gone. I played hide-and-seek with some clown fish in the morning, and in the afternoon, I played with some dolphins who came to visit. Life in the ocean really was magical. After a few more games, I headed home. Dad would be there soon. I had no idea what his surprise would be.

  “We’re going on an adventure, Rach!” Dad called when he finally got home from work. “You look like you need some cheering up, and I’ve been working far too much. Let’s go have some fun! We both deserve it.”

  I nodded, trying not to look too guilty. I’d have to tell him my plans when we got home.

  “I know you didn’t get a big thirteen-year-old celebration like all the other mermaids, so we’re going to have our own celebration before dinner,” he said, grinning. “You and I are going to sing with the whales!”

  “Really?” I gasped. That had been our favorite thing to do before Mom died. We would travel outside Caspian and call to the whales. The whales didn’t usually sing with other sea creatures, but they could never resist joining in when they heard Dad and me singing together. Dad
had taught me how to harmonize with the whales in a special key.

  We swam out of Neptunia and kept going, the two of us bouncing in and out of waves toward the deepest parts of the ocean. Once we were in whale territory, Dad started to sing in his glorious voice. He soon signaled for me to join him, and before I knew it, sea creatures from all depths of the ocean came to watch.

  We sang and sang, and dolphins and sea turtles danced around Dad and me, clapping their fins along to the music! Finally, it was time to leave. We bid farewell to all of our new friends and began to swim back toward Neptunia. On the way back, he stopped to show me a rare frost flower growing out of the ocean.

  “Is everything okay, Rachel?” Dad asked me when we got home. “I want you to be happy. If you don’t like it here, we can move again.”

  “Oh, Dad,” I said. My eyes stung, and I thought I might cry. “You love it here, don’t you? Working with the Queen?”

  He swam to me and put his arm around me. “The main reason we moved here was so you would be happier. That’s the most important thing to me.”

  I leaned against him. “I love Neptunia, Dad. I really do,” I said. “And Shyanna and Cora are the best. It’s just …”

  “What is it?” He stared down at me with concern.

  “I miss Owen. I’m afraid he’s forgetting about me. I can’t go and see him as much as I once did,” I explained. “He was — I mean, is — my best friend. I feel like I’m losing him.”

  Dad nodded. He was a great listener.

  “And, well, one of the mermaids found out I’m half-human,” I said. “I have no idea how, but I guess it doesn’t matter. I’m afraid the teasing is going to start up again. I don’t know if I’ll ever fit in, no matter what kingdom we go to. When mermaids find out about Mom, some of them don’t like it.”

  His face turned red. “Who said something?” he asked angrily. “I will talk to her parents.”

  “No, Dad. You know that will only make it worse,” I said.

  He let go of me and swam in a circle, flipping his tail in frustration. “But it’s not right. There has to be something we can do.”

  “Well,” I told him. “Maybe there is something. I’ve been thinking about it a lot.”

  He tilted his head, waiting.

  “What if we became human?” I asked softly. “I mean … what if we went to live on land? Forever.”

  Chapter Eight

  Dad gasped. “You don’t want to be a mermaid anymore?”

  “I love being a mermaid,” I said. “But I’m sick of being different. If we became human together, we would eventually forget our mermaid life. We’d fit in with the humans, and I could still keep Shyanna and Rachel as friends. They could come visit once they get their legs. I wouldn’t remember that they were mermaids, but we could still be friends. All four of us — Owen, Shyanna, Cora, and me.”

  “That’s really what you want?” Dad asked.

  I nodded. “It wouldn’t be so bad, would it? I mean, you must know a lot about being human from being married to Mom.”

  He hugged me again. “Being different is what makes us special, Rach.”

  “Sometimes it’s hard being special,” I admitted.

  Suddenly, the doorbell rang, interrupting us. Shyanna and Rachel were floating at the door, arriving for the sleepover party.

  “I know that.” Dad sighed, looking a little defeated. “I’ll do anything for you, Rachel. You know that. Let me see what I can do.”

  * * *

  “Wake up, girls!”

  I rubbed my eyes and looked at the clock beside my bed. It was early! Why was Dad waking us up? Didn’t he know we liked to stay up as late as we could keep our eyes open at sleepover parties? Shyanna and Rachel were still sleeping on the floor beside my bed.

  “Up and at ’em!” Dad called.

  We all groaned.

  “Come on. I’ll make sardine pancakes for breakfast, but you’ll have to eat them quickly. In the meantime, comb your hair, brush your teeth, and get ready!”

  “Ready for what?” I asked, groggily. “Dad, sleepover parties don’t end at seven in the morning. We still have things to do. We haven’t even painted our fingernails or braided shells into our hair.”

  He tried really hard without Mom, but sometimes Dad really didn’t understand girl rules.

  “This is important,” he said. “I talked to the Queen last night.”

  The girls rubbed their eyes. I frowned, asking him, “You did? When?”

  “When I took the cook home last night after dinner,” he explained. “I asked the Queen for a special meeting. She’s a busy lady, and the only time she could meet with us was at eight this morning. So we have to get going. All of us! This is important. Lend the girls some sparkly tops and make sure you all look presentable.”

  Shyanna and Cora nodded, excited. It wasn’t often that mermaids our age got to meet with the Queen in private.

  “What’s it about?” I asked him, glancing at my two friends, who looked equally puzzled.

  “It’s a secret.” He wouldn’t say anything more.

  The girls and I jumped up out of bed and started to get ready while Dad made breakfast.

  “I wonder what your dad is up to,” Shyanna whispered.

  I squeezed her hand. “I have no idea,” I said. “All I know is that I’m sick of secrets.”

  Chapter Nine

  The King and Queen’s palace was so fancy! It was hard to believe Dad got to go there every day for work. Shyanna, Cora, and I giggled when the Queen’s guard announced our names outside the private quarters. We tried our hardest not to freak out when they led us into the Queen’s parlor.

  The Queen was sitting on her throne, wearing a light purple cape. Her long blond hair was braided with sparkles and the fanciest pearls. She looked regal, proper, and perfect.

  She stood and winked at us when we came in. “Look. It’s my favorite warm-up singers and my coach!” she said. The nerves in my stomach melted. “You girls did such an amazing job at the concert. I’d like to do it again sometime!”

  The Queen offered us some tea, and we sat at a table in front of her throne. There were large cookies with pink frosting on a plate on the table. It might have been early, but that didn’t stop Shyanna from grabbing a cookie right away.

  “Your majesty,” my dad said, bowing his head. “I asked to speak with you today about a matter of extreme importance.”

  We all stared at Dad.

  “As you know, my daughter, Rachel, is half- human,” he continued.

  “I am aware,” the Queen said with a smile. “Her mother — your wife — was a wonderful mermaid, wife, mom, and friend. She took to our life so well. It was a pleasure to welcome her to our world with magic. It was one of the best decisions I have ever made. I am still so sorry for your loss.”

  “Thank you. We are too. We miss her every day,” Dad said, looking down. Then he glanced at me. “This is what I came to discuss. The fact is that no recent mermaids in Neptunia have had human mothers. And in the past — in other kingdoms — Rachel has been teased for being half-human.”

  Cora and Shyanna each grabbed one of my hands and squeezed it tightly.

  The Queen frowned, but my dad kept going. “Rachel can travel to land and stay there as long as she wants. I’ve allowed her to explore, and while on land she made a really special friend. A human.”

  The Queen nodded. “Owen,” she said. “He is a good human.”

  My cheeks got a little warm.

  “Don’t look so surprised, Rachel,” the Queen said. “We know about Owen. For your protection. We keep an eye on our mermaids, even when they’re on land.”

  “Unfortunately,” Dad said, “teasing is something Rachel never escapes. For that, among other reasons, she’s expressed interest in becoming a human.”

  The Queen tilted
her head and gazed at me with wide, sympathetic eyes. “Is that true?”

  I nodded, unable to speak. Afraid.

  “If you give up your tail, you can never get it back,” the Queen said.

  I swallowed, grateful the girls were holding my hands. I didn’t want to think about giving up being a mermaid forever, but it seemed like the best solution. I wanted Owen to be a part of my life all the time. I wanted to have a normal life.

  “I have a different solution,” my dad said. “One that might make Rachel reconsider her choice.”

  We all stared at him. Even the Queen.

  “What if we grant Owen temporary merman status to visit Rachel? He’s thirteen, so he could do the same as mermaids do on land, only in reverse. A few hours in the ocean to see her life. And then Rachel could share her friends and her world here with Owen. She wouldn’t have to keep her real self a secret from him anymore.”

  “Exposure to humans is always risky,” the Queen said, frowning.

  “But my mom proved to be trustworthy!” I cried.

  She raised her hand. “Let me finish, please.”

  I pressed my lips tightly.

  “Owen has the right human qualities to be trusted,” the Queen continued. “The question is, would having Owen visit keep you from wanting to turn to human form permanently?”

  I nodded my head vigorously. Having Owen know the truth really would help. My dad was a genius.

  “He would have to keep the secret,” the Queen said. “And if he didn’t, he would turn into a merman. He would never be able to return back to human form. His family would believe he was lost at sea. This is a delicate matter that must be taken very seriously. Do you understand what you are asking?”

  I thought about Owen and how he always said there was nothing that could prevent him from being my friend. I knew he could be trusted. I nodded again.

  “I do, and I know they are only teenagers,” my dad said. “But I believe they have old souls and can be trusted. Their friendship is stronger than any I’ve ever witnessed.”